The Hot Chick

Back in high school I was always fortunate to hang out with the hot chicks. I was not voted best looking nor was I the jock or mysterious artist guy. I was the nice funny fat kid that the girls just wanted to be friends with....Yea it was a cruel joke. While I was thinking about getting to 2nd base they wanted to cry on my shoulder about the last boy who broke up with them. The truth is I vowed to never settle and knew that one day I would have the HOT CHICK. Thankfully, after high school I discovered the gym and a little bit of confidence ultimately my nice inside caught up with my outside. I was at a friends wedding and was drinking one of the many vodka sodas I had chugged back that night and noticed this very very HOT CHICK. After drink number nine I decided to approach this beautiful girl and start a conversation .That was the night that I met my wife Jenn. On our first date I arrived at her door with sunflowers and we had a date that neither of us wanted to end. I use to call Jenn my Audrey Hepburn, because she has this classic look that only a movie star could possess. My wife has long spiral curls, hazel green eyes, and a smile that's resembles Julia Roberts. No matter what she wears her figure can make it look like it was fit for the runway. I didn't settle I ended up marrying the hot Chick, the best part was she also had an inside that matched her outside. I am not trying to turn this into a sappy love story, but knowing this background will only make the blogs to come that much more funny and honest. I want you all to hold on to this first description because after you get a woman pregnant incredible transformations start to happen almost immediately....and you may question ...What Happened To The Hot Chick? The truth is my wife is more beautiful to me now then ever, but some changes are a happening and I'm just saying prepare yourselves. The well put together perfect woman will start to look like they got left out in a bad wind storm, and she can be soooooo mean. Those perfect spiral curls are starting to resemble the angry Greek goddess Medusa, and trust me I have at moments turned to stone. Her amazing smile transforms into the mighty roar of an angry lion, and her eyes they seem to glass over into a rage that could shatter any mirror. These are the wonderful moments you have to look forward to...oh did I mention my wife is only in her 11th week of pregnancy? Like I said earlier hold on to that classic beauty because Audrey Hepburn is starting to resemble Freddy Krueger " 1,2 Freddy's coming for you, 3-4, better lock your door, 5-6...well you get the picture.